Saturday, September 19, 2009 , 9/19/2009 06:51:00 PM

⇨i want... time to go back.

I want the next 27 days to quickly flyyyy, EOYs over and band pracs to resume, and throw all my notes into the fire and dance around the fire.

I really really don't have the mood or motivation at all to study for EOYs so I'm definitely screwed.

Okay, I sound totally in a bad mood, depressed,PMS-ish or whatsoever but I don't see what is there to smile about now in my life. Geography is killing me, Chemistry is confusing, my Chinese is deproving, my English is as sucky as ever... OMG.

I want time to go back, to those really hectic but fun SYF pracs with HuiMin and YanHao. I want HuiMin and YanHao back in our section, having those long breaks and eating cup noodles at dong and HuiMin playing with me again.
I want, I want, I want, I WANT.

I really miss those days... everything seemed so much clearer and straightforward, working towards the same goal even though we didn't achieve it in the end. But what we achieved was something far much deeper, and complex that those who did not experience it themselves will never comprehend in their entire life. Now, everything seems like a never-ending track with no signs or directions. nothing at all.

I'm tired. I just want to close my eyes and rest... instead of competing with others, and standing those fake smiles and words, trying to ignore those words. No one understands. It's only me, standing in this downpour.

"Just rest for a moment. It's OK. Yes, things are crazy, yes, the world is going nuts. Yet, deep underneath the stormy waves, there, in the core of your being, there is pure silence, pure love. And ... it's ... just ... OK."
- We think God wants you to know... application

somehow, it echoes what I'm feeling now.